Dear Mick,
I do hope that you can help me with a problem that my boyfriend SEEMS to think is nothing to worry about as usual! It is with regards to his penis and the lack of size it has. It is minute and I feel nothing. Is this a Bodybuilders thing only? He only lasts for about 30 seconds and that is it. What can I do?
Alicia Flamper, Devon
Dear Miss Flamper,
Well the first thing that you can do is get off your HIGH horse and for a start STOP highlighting words to cover your shame and TOTAL selfishness my girl. A Bodybuilders THING you think eh! Have you not thought that is could be a WOMAN’S problem. Maybe you were a little generous with the wide-legged-syndome before you met him as is per usual with your type!
Your guy trains day in, day out to impress you in bed and all you can think of is a small matter of SMALL!? I suggest that you do the same as you do when there is a severe drought on and place a brick inside to make up the difference. The only other alternative is to thread string between your ‘lips’ and when he enters you, pull the strings tight. Then, after sex, up you should get and make soft boiled eggs and toastie soldiers as a treat, as it is obvious that he will be tired after looking after YOUR needs me girl! Then, you could give him oral whilst he dips his bread – so to speak!
I am telling you Joanne,
You Baby him too much
Dear Mick,
I am at my wits end sir. I have tried, oh how I have tried, but I don’t think that I can take any more. I come home from the gym exhausted and you know how tired that can be. On my way home from the gym I call in and have a few pints with the lads; a game of cards or darts maybe. Sometimes a trip to the casino on occassions when I feel a little tense. Nothing wrong with that is there? But what happens when I get home? Nag, nag, nag! Where have you been, you know the script.
And you are not going to believe this – but sometimes my dinner is not ready for when I get in; I have had to wait for more than 20 minutes on occasion!! I hate to say this but I have even considered stopping my training to get some peace Mick! She even wanted to take some of my wages for the kid’s Christmas presents when she KNOWS full well that I am saving up for my next steroid cycle. Please help a brother with your wisdom.
W. Ittsend, North Yorks.
Dear W,
There, there mate. Please pull yourself together, we are with you, my bodybuilding brother. You must stay strong against this reaccuring, me, me problem that dominates the female world. You must be so distressed at her attitude when you come home, well if you come home. Basically that should be her punishment also. Think about it. If she does not start and pull her self together and stop thinking about herself all of the time, stay out a few nights.
Take the housekeeping AND the childrens Christmas money and go out and buy your next steroid cycle and teach her a lesson. Also, you could go out with her best friend, only for a couple of nights mind then call your wife up and ask her if she wants sex with the two of you. THEN when she turns up all lovey dovey, just ignore her and take her friend instead. THEN ask her for oral and when she agrees – say that you are not in the mood. That’ll teach HER a lesson buddy! I don’t know Brother, all you want to do is to get in shape to please her! We all feel for you.
Stay strong.
- Mick hart.
Founder of mick hart training systems and
the no bull collection magazine.
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http://www.bodybuildingandsteroids.com/laymans-index.htm-
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http://www.bodybuildingandanabolicsteroids.com/
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